Skip to main content

Dear Charlene Robson,

You don't know me, but I know you.

In the summer of 1998, you went to see Bard on the Beach. You carried Wet'n'Wild lipstick in your purse, along with a small mirror, a Kleenex, and a small booklet. It was entitled Have you made the wonderful discovery of the Spirit-filled life?

I believe you have two brothers. You went to high school in Unionville, but I believe junior high was in Calgary. You went to Trinity Western University. You are now 39 years old, I believe. You liked stenciling and once hand-stamped Christmas cards for friends & family. You traveled in Europe - Germany and Switzerland, I'm guessing. You met the Armerdings, whom I have also met.

(is this creepy?) You might be wondering how I know all this. I know all this because you used to live in my house. And you left your junk here.

Last night we found it. We took some of the more useful stuff: like the $5.35 in change, and a Rubbermaid container, and the Christmas card stamp. Some of the less useful stuff we are giving away - a couple sweaters and some jumper cables. And some of the really useless stuff (like eight roles of developed pictures, mainly of a house and Christmas tree), we have left in the crawlspace.

So just in case you wanted your stuff, it's still here.

Mostly.

Comments

Laura J said…
this is a great post. I hope Charlene reads it!
Terra said…
so funny.
i love you beast.

Popular posts from this blog

Fostering FAQ: How Can You Say Goodbye?

It seems I finally have something(s) to say... Here's the first in a short (or maybe long?) series on Fostering FAQs. If you've got a question to add, feel free to comment/email/text/message me and maybe the next post will be in response.

--

8:30 am on Day 4 of parenting. I woke up in a panic two hours ago because I remembered that there is a baby and I am responsible for her (at least at 6:30am, when the man beside me will snore through anything). Now, I have put on clothes and eaten breakfast. The dogs are walked, there is a loaf of banana bread in the oven. My tea is steeping. Most importantly, Dream Baby is already down for her first nap.

Despite my morning efficiency, I'm already beginning to see that even with the happiest, most easygoing, and smiliest baby, like we somehow managed to be given, parenting is a grind. On Friday night, I couldn't join friends for $5 pints at a local joint. Instead, I blearily washed the same 8 bottles again, and then made another ba…

Fostering FAQ: How Long Will She Stay/Will You Adopt Her?

Our first foster baby came with about 18 hours notice; it was respite care, which means we had him for a few days while his regular foster family had a break/dealt with a family emergency. He stayed 3 nights, long enough to come to church and have a dozen people cooing over his little sleeping cheeks.  With each new visitor to our quiet corner, I explained again that he would be going back to his foster family the next day.

Barely a week later, we got a 9am phone call with a fostering request and by the same afternoon, we were snuggling her. This time, we had her for 4 days before church came around. Again, our community was keen to see the little one we had in tow. Again, the question, "How long will she stay?" And this time, "Are you going to adopt her?"

--

Here in Toronto, when a child is placed in foster care, it is always for an indefinite length of time. It depends on the parents' situation, and whether they are able to make a safe home environment for th…

Fostering FAQ: What's Her (Mom's) Story?

This is probably the second most common question I hear about the baby currently in our care, right after, "Will you keep her?"

It comes in many forms:

"So, what's her story?"
"Is her mom in the picture?"
"How did she end up in your home?
"Is her mom a drug addict?"
"How could a mom not love such a cute baby!"

I get it. It's natural curiousity, and I know I've asked similar questions of my friends who are adoptive parents.


But here's what I'm learning: a child's story is their own. And equally as important, the parent's story is their own.

Imagine how it might feel to hear that for the foreseeable future, you are not allowed to care for your child. On top of whatever difficult circumstances you are already in - perhaps poverty, social isolation, lack of adequate housing, domestic violence, intergenerational trauma, drug or alcohol dependency, low cognitive functioning, or a myriad of other complex strug…