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Trying to Toss & Turn

I didn't sleep well last night. It took me over two hours to fall asleep, and then, two hours later, this happened again. Not the weird presence part, but the sleep paralysis part, where I wake up but am completely unable to move.

Completely.
Unable.
To move.

In my dream, my roommate was walking past my bed or to my bed - and I realized it was a dream, but wasn't sure if she was maybe really up, and if so, was she ok? So I woke up, and couldn't even open my eyes.

Couldn't.
Open.
My eyes.

I know I was awake. I panicked just a little. I can't explain how frightening this is. And what a relief it is when your body finally obeys.

Comments

Silas said…
that must be quite frightening, i can't imagine. when going through that, do you feel utter loneliness? or just fear? I read a book that describes a similar condition like this... except it wasn't during sleep.
Beth said…
fear - well, a bit of loneliness in that i can't communicate to those who are near me. but mostly just fear.
Mindy said…
Aww, no wonder you looked so tired today. I hope you sleep better tonight.
Jill said…
hey Beth, it's Jill from SFU C4C :) i found your blog off other ppl's blogs. just wanted to say that something kind of similar happened to me continually this past spring. except i tend to think it wasn't just physiological, but a spiritual attack of sorts. there were a few specific occurrences that lead me to believe that. and then even though it stopped i was afraid to go to sleep for awhile. long story. but i'll pray for your rest tonight!
Beth said…
thanks, jill :) i definitely think that the borders of psychology and spirituality are pretty gray in some cases - like this. i've been sleeping well, and thankfully it's not been a frequent thing.

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