Skip to main content

An "Alive List": Email Excerpts

I've got more email excerpts for you.

This may become a series! Ok, this is totally an informal series. If you want to email me and have a profound conversation*, maybe I'll ask if I can post a piece of it here, to bring others into the dialogue.

Here's the set-up:
I was alarmed to realize today that I don't know what really makes me come alive. I need to think on this more, because there must be a number of things, and I should be doing those things, but I feel like I'm not really doing much that I get excited about.... Some days I'll just feel inspired to do stuff, and on those days it feels like everything is what I was made to do: cycling, dishes, work, conversation, cooking, art, hiking, improv, anything. But I wish I knew more clearly what makes my heart come alive... do you know for yourself? Do you ever get into this with your SD**? Does this question seem important to you? I'm thinking about it a lot at this moment, so it feels very important to me.

And my response:  
Your questions are very much like the ones that I discuss with my SD. This question of what makes you come alive is so good. So big. A good one. A doozy.

I have thought about it a lot, and I have a short list (that I'm sure will shift with time). Partly, this came out of a book I read called Courage and Calling by Gordon T Smith. I highly recommend it.... I'm also reading a book right now called An Altar in this World, and there is a quote that I thought of when I read your thoughts on feeling like ALL THE THINGS ARE RIGHT AND GOOD (that is how I internalized this line of your email: "Some days I'll just feel inspired to do stuff, and on those days it feels like everything is what I was made to do: cycling, dishes, work, conversation, cooking, art, hiking, improv, anything.") 
My alive-list. Can I share it? I know it will be very different from yours, but maybe reading it will prompt a thought/idea/framework in your mind that will help you sort through your own self.
  1. Reading or writing something that is true & beautiful. There is a sensation of being struck that I KNOW. It is that awareness of being alive, a person of feelings and thoughts, and having them keenly activated. (I shared a piece on my blog recently that makes me feel this.)
  2. Art/photography that captures the world in a certain way. The kind of art I want to grab off a wall and hug (or sometimes throw violently onto the ground because it is sad and heavy).
  3. Conversations like this. The moments when there's no bs or need to present some front, and existential truths and struggles are out in the open to unpack in a gentle fashion.
  4. Walking in the woods/watching the sunset/listening to crickets. Being in silence, realizing it isn't silence at all, but that I'm wandering through living breathing spaces. The sense of awe that comes from the fact that other things are ALIVE and all around me.
  5.  Holding a sleeping child. (there is nothing more to say on that.)

What about YOU? What's your alive-list? And, a more difficult follow-up question I'd love to blog about another time: how do you incorporate that into how you live your life?



*I really like emails and snail-mails, and they don't need to be profound, if you don't want to. If you're reading this blog, you're always welcome to send me a note. 99% chance I'll respond, 1% chance I'll find you creepy.

**SD = spiritual director. The answer is yes, we do talk about this and so much more. I have been mulling over a blog post (or seven) on meeting with her for months now. I should get on that.
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The ROM, The Earth & Procreation

Disclaimer: This post is intended to generate discussion and a sharing of many opinions. It is NOT intended to judge or condemn anyone's life choices. I had an unexpected moment at the ROM last month. C and I were listening to a presentation for kids on wildlife conservation (or rather, I was listening, and C was eagerly anticipating what live animal would come out next), when a statement caught my attention and still hasn't let go. For most of history, the earth could provide enough resources for the earth's human population. But today, our population is growing rapidly, increasing by 250 000 people every day... Forty years from now, it will require 2 Earths to provide sustainably for our survival as a human species. But we only have 1 Earth. 250 000 people. Every day. That is roughly twice the size of my hometown. In one day. So I did a little math. (First, I rounded down to 200 000, just in case the figures were inflated or failed to account for some sort o...
27 comments
Read more

Women And Our Ways: Intro

Last summer, I started writing a blog entry that I never finished. There are several like that, actually. This particular one starts out: If you are male, you probably don't want to read this entry. I mean it. If you were grossed out by my entry on placenta lasagna , didn't understand the problematic tea commercial , or were surprised by my thoughts on the curse of Aunt Irma , this one is bigger, badder, and more bold. I'm going for broke. I've been meaning to write this girls-only series ever since. But then I realized that I want to write a series that may frighten or surprise men, but is not meant to exclude them. Then I thought that maybe I don't want to do that, as it will stir up controversy and I will be misunderstood and I will unintentionally offend both men and women and I will write about things that don't often get talked about. But I think I'm willing to risk it. Titles in the series Women and Our Ways may include: The Mo...
10 comments
Read more

Sunday Starters

I'm not sure if I'm going to keep up with a different 'theme' for blogging every day. Sometimes I like it, and sometimes I hate it. But what I do know is that Sundays are no longer Fundays. (well, in reality, I'm sure they still will be). Instead, I want to do this: I start a sentence, and we all fill it in. However we want. There is only one rule: You have to play the game too. Example: Happiness is... ...a warm puppy ...time with my family ...a myth ...knowing that in the end, he/she's got my back. ...impossible to pin down. This week's starter: When I was six, I thought...
14 comments
Read more