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Sick.

Yesterday, I woke up and walked to the bathroom and thought, There is no way I can go to work today. So I slept all day (did you notice I was too tired even to tweet!?). And managed to "sit" long enough to watch some So You Think You Can Dance with Karen, but she had to bring it into my room.

This morning, I felt a bit better and decided to shower. And then I needed to nap, and around 11am, I thought, Maybe I should go into work this afternoon. So I left at noon, and got money to buy transit tokens, because I knew I couldn't walk like I usually do. And by the time I got to the streetcar station, I thought, This may have been a mistake. But then I thought, It'll be okay once I'm there and sitting down.

So I got there and sat down, and staring at the computer screen made me feel woozy, but I lasted for two hours. I did the time-sensitive work and then I came home. Then I napped. Deeply.

And now it is Tuesday evening, and I am feeling hungry-ish, for the first time since Sunday. And I only have two and a half days of work ahead of me, and although being sick is the pits, it's a little bit of a blessing because the long weekend will be great and I have slept a lot, which apparently my body needed. And I was too tired to overthink my life, which I have been doing recently, and apparently my mind needed that rest too.

Sometimes, the only way for me to really rest is to get sick, and I need to be reminded that I cannot just keep pushing myself (like I tried to do this afternoon). I am in control of me, but sometimes I'm not really, and I need to be okay with that.

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