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Someone Else's Words

I have a dear friend who makes me laugh and cry and who hugs me like very few people hug. Our friendship is full of pauses and silence, and yet it has never been awkward. I have cried with her and I have cried for her, and the thing that makes me happiest is seeing how Jesus is working in her heart.

Last week, she sent me this in an email, and I teared up. Because I love her honesty. Because she and Jesus are getting better. Because these could be my words.


I often come home at the end of the day with a lot of baggage. I am tired, I am worn out. I say, "I wish I did a better job at this" or "I shouldn't have done that" or "I wish I was nicer today", or "I'm not proud of what I did' or "I don't actually like Jesus that much" or "I am not worthy". I get frustrated.

I have a post-it note in front of me on my desk...on which I have written some words. It says "Just having me back is ALL HE DESIRES". I love reading it, again and again, every day. Because it instantly pushes the pile of ugly thoughts away. It silences. It reminds me what Jesus wants isn't the carefully-crafted prayer or anything that would "make up" for all the rebellions, the denials, the stumbles, and the failures of the day. He isn't looking for something that would compensate in any form. It isn't like, "OK, you better come up with a good explanation for this mess. You have 2 minutes. Start now." It isn't like that at all. At the end of each day I look at these words and remember that yes, I am a mess, I run away,...but Jesus desires me back.

Not me + good excuses.
Not me + wordy apologies.
Just me.

Comments

MLW said…
He wants just me, THAT'S THE TRUTH!
Thanks for sharing this and thanks to you friend for sharing.
afro-chick said…
AMEN AMEN AMEN!!!

what freedom (:
yep, these words could be my words.

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