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Happy Month-iversary to ME

I have been home from Spain for one month.

Where did it go? I don't know. But since I'm still thinking about Spain, I'm still blogging about Spain. One of my favourite parts of the trip (as everyone has been asking) is how much laughter there was. The days were not always easy, and things did not always happen perfectly. But we laughed. Oh, we laughed. Mostly, I laughed at K's incredibly fast wit. Here is a list of some of the funniest things she said during the trip. It all started with this one, on the plane:
Flight attendant: (speaking with a French accent) We're going to dime the lights shortly...
K: We're going to dime these things til they're nickeled!
After that, I kept a detailed log. These are in chronological order, and as out-of-context as my quote entries usually are. The great thing, though, is that in my head I can picture the context for each one and it has me giggling all over again.
I just touched my tongue to my arm, because I was curious. It's really salty! I'm a salt lick! (she licks her arm again)
(pointing at a cow with her walking stick) You! You are cute! You are a good-looking cow!
I'm starting to believe I could survive childbirth.
K: I will be quiet now, out of respect for the D-E-A-D.
Me: That makes sense, because the dead can't S-P-E-L-L.
Me: Let's see if we can stick our heads in there.
(there is a closed iron gate.)
K: If you stick your head in there, I will give you a cookie. Then I will leave you there, because you'll be stuck.
He said that the Camino is fuerte. I told him I am ALSO fuerte.
He ripped the skin off my pinky toe. And then poured iodine on it. And I didn't cry. So yeah, I could push a baby or two out. At least then your body is working WITH you.
Maybe I should be buying gold right now and burying it in my parents' yard. Because I don't have a yard.
When I was running, I was like, "I'm running!"
If you ever need to think unsexy thoughts, just think about my toe.
K: I don't know if I can do this. (swim in a pool)
Me: I don't think you can; Norwegians are a weak people.
K: It's true. We love being weak. And warm.
My hips are tired. And sore like I have just given birth.
There's a cemetery; how about I just go lie down and you can start shoveling dirt on me. I feel like that's the next logical step.
I waved. He waved back. It was a great story.
(five minutes later, another car) I waved, then he waved back. It was a beautiful moment.
Feel free to lick me dry!
(to the wind)
If I fall over here, on my back, I'm just going to stay here. It will be my new home. If I fall on my front, I'll roll over onto my back. And if I fall on my side, I guess I'll stay there. I like sleeping on my side.
This is a big piece of meat. It's as big as a sock.
Once upon a time, we accidentally walked forty kilometres in one day. It was a good story. The End. Love, Kirsten.
(singing) One foot, one foot, one foot in front of the other. One foot, one foot, one foot in front of the other.
I just made that up. It's a pretty good song.
Who has two thumbs and maybe nine toes and...
K: I don't think that bird knows how to fly.
Me: Um, I'm pretty sure it does...
K: Gasp! Oh, look, it just figured it out!
K: If I could relive five minutes, I would relive those ones.
Me: Of this whole trip, that is what you'd pick!? Must be some good chocolate croissant...
K: I was thinking five minutes of my life in general. It was a very good croissant.
I don't hate him. I just want to choke him a little.
Nothing like making an eight year old regret her choices in life.

Comments

Thom said…
Delightful! Just delightful. For real, I was and continue to be delighted by those quotes.
sarahtp said…
More, please! Your friend Kirsten is hilarious.

Can we get together one of these days?

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