Today was full of conversations. Some mine, some overheard.
Friend: oooh, the nose piercing! I haven't seen it in person yet.
Me: (modeling nose piercing, if such a thing is possible) So? (in peppy voice) Do I look bad-ass?
Friend: (looks at me strangely and laughs)
Me: What!?
Friend: You're wearing a sweater with pink owls on it!
Me: No, the sweater is pink. The owls are...dark green? (looking at sleeve)
Friend: Green!? They're black!
Me: (looking closer) Maybe, yeah, sure...they're black.
Friend: So you're bad-ass AND you're colour blind...
Friend: I give you two thumbs up!
Me: Wait a second...you gave me two thumbs up for my Chinese accent, which you LAUGHED AT.
Friend: Oh, those were sarcastic thumbs up. I thought you knew that...
Stranger 1: (ranting about the injustice of a cheater who doesn't work as hard as her)
Stranger 2: (calmly) I understand that you're upset about this, but getting worked up isn't helping anything. And you're upsetting me. Nothing has actually happened, so if you want to be proactive and decide that tomorrow you're going to talk to whomever and say blah-blah-blah, then that's one thing. But unless you have a proactive solution, I think we should stop talking about this.
Stranger 1: (pause) Okay, I have a proactive solution. Let's go eat dinner, then buy my chocolate, then go to bed. And I want a dress.
Stranger 2: That has nothing to do with your problem.
Stranger 1: I know. But it'll make me feel better.
Friend 1: (telling a story about a couple who were saving sex for marriage) So, they were having some boundary issues, and -
Friend 2: Boundary issues? Like he was in her boundaries?
Friend 1: (pause) Yeah, he was in her boundaries. She was up in his...
Me: In her boundaries?!
All three of us: (laughter)
Me: (guinea-pig-esque squealing laughter)
Bartender: You have a great laugh. The best I've heard in awhile.
Friends: (more laughter at my laughter)
Me: (still laughing, trying to stop, embarrassed but happy)
Friend: oooh, the nose piercing! I haven't seen it in person yet.
Me: (modeling nose piercing, if such a thing is possible) So? (in peppy voice) Do I look bad-ass?
Friend: (looks at me strangely and laughs)
Me: What!?
Friend: You're wearing a sweater with pink owls on it!
Me: No, the sweater is pink. The owls are...dark green? (looking at sleeve)
Friend: Green!? They're black!
Me: (looking closer) Maybe, yeah, sure...they're black.
Friend: So you're bad-ass AND you're colour blind...
Friend: I give you two thumbs up!
Me: Wait a second...you gave me two thumbs up for my Chinese accent, which you LAUGHED AT.
Friend: Oh, those were sarcastic thumbs up. I thought you knew that...
Stranger 1: (ranting about the injustice of a cheater who doesn't work as hard as her)
Stranger 2: (calmly) I understand that you're upset about this, but getting worked up isn't helping anything. And you're upsetting me. Nothing has actually happened, so if you want to be proactive and decide that tomorrow you're going to talk to whomever and say blah-blah-blah, then that's one thing. But unless you have a proactive solution, I think we should stop talking about this.
Stranger 1: (pause) Okay, I have a proactive solution. Let's go eat dinner, then buy my chocolate, then go to bed. And I want a dress.
Stranger 2: That has nothing to do with your problem.
Stranger 1: I know. But it'll make me feel better.
Friend 1: (telling a story about a couple who were saving sex for marriage) So, they were having some boundary issues, and -
Friend 2: Boundary issues? Like he was in her boundaries?
Friend 1: (pause) Yeah, he was in her boundaries. She was up in his...
Me: In her boundaries?!
All three of us: (laughter)
Me: (guinea-pig-esque squealing laughter)
Bartender: You have a great laugh. The best I've heard in awhile.
Friends: (more laughter at my laughter)
Me: (still laughing, trying to stop, embarrassed but happy)
guinea-pig-esque laughter indeed.
ReplyDeletetoo tooooo funny. 'pink' owls, AND hearts. can't forget about those hearts....
ReplyDeleteoh man. good times. i always tell myself i will remember conversations i hear during the day and then i don't. especially things my husband says. i need a little tape recorded to just pull out when he starts talking.
ReplyDeletealso i love the blog theme. i have been reading you posts in google reader and apparently that is a cryin shame because i was missing out on all the extra lovelies on your blog.
thanks, sarah!
ReplyDeleteand i agree, i wish i had a voice recorder to take with me during my day...something subtle, so i could record without anyone knowing.