Skip to main content

Mondays Mean More: This Year's Theme

I'm not great with resolutions or goal-setting. It stresses me out because I get overly focused on the task at hand and beat myself up if/when I don't accomplish it. I've been this way for a long time - I've got a list from an old journal entitled "Things I want to be." The last item on the list of fifteen adjectives is PERFECT. I still remember writing the list and wishing that I was essentially a different person than I am.

To over-compensate, as an adult I set goals that are so low and easy to reach that they're pretty much non-goals. Which may be less helpful than having too many impossible goals. But I think I'm finally finding my middle ground. Instead of goals or resolutions (although I do both of those in small ways, like when I decided to join a gym or go six weeks without using the word "busy"), I mark my years with themes.

For 2008-2009, the theme that I would say dominated my life was rest. I learned (and applied) a lot about the reality of God as a God of rest, the vital need for rest as a part of a well-balanced life, and what it means/looks like to have a heart that is truly at rest.

And then, in the fall, I felt the winds of change begin to blow. I read some books. I had a lot of conversations, and in my heart, I landed on the theme for the next part of my life.


I'm not a chance-taker, by nature. I'm a pragmatist. I like guaranteed outcomes. I dislike failure.

BUT life is not guaranteed. Things won't always be easy. And if I never fail, I never learn. Or at least, I learn a lot less.

PLUS my resistance to risk means that I'm missing out on some experiential knowledge of God as a God who is trustworthy and capable and good to His promises.

So I've been thinking a lot about risks and getting ready to take some (in a calculated and slow sort of way). And I'd love to hear from all of you:

hat are risks you've taken that played out well?
What are lessons you've learned from trying and failing?
What's one thing you dream of taking a risk on?

Final thought: if you type "risk" into Youtube, this is your top hit:


Nadine said…
Last year, I scribbled down: "Be up for the adventure. Laugh a lot. Love without abandon. Take risks. Write it down."

And so I did. I quit my job with no real plan, just a sense of urgency: now or never. And I started to follow a still-not-completely-defined dream.

I've learned that moving forward is what matters. (Even if it's falling forward.) And that being completely NON-self-sufficient is a beautiful freeing thing.

I've learned that risk-taking doesn't have to be a lonely experience. There are people willing to come alongside you in wonderfully encouraging and challenging ways. Community is important. Like the High School Musical kids sing, "We're all in this together."

Other "risk" lessons learned? "Never take a risk on a boy who calls you by your last name." But that was soooo 2008 :)

End of novel. Beginning of adventure.

Popular posts from this blog

Fostering FAQ: How Can You Say Goodbye?

It seems I finally have something(s) to say... Here's the first in a short (or maybe long?) series on Fostering FAQs. If you've got a question to add, feel free to comment/email/text/message me and maybe the next post will be in response.


8:30 am on Day 4 of parenting. I woke up in a panic two hours ago because I remembered that there is a baby and I am responsible for her (at least at 6:30am, when the man beside me will snore through anything). Now, I have put on clothes and eaten breakfast. The dogs are walked, there is a loaf of banana bread in the oven. My tea is steeping. Most importantly, Dream Baby is already down for her first nap.

Despite my morning efficiency, I'm already beginning to see that even with the happiest, most easygoing, and smiliest baby, like we somehow managed to be given, parenting is a grind. On Friday night, I couldn't join friends for $5 pints at a local joint. Instead, I blearily washed the same 8 bottles again, and then made another ba…

Fostering FAQ: How Long Will She Stay/Will You Adopt Her?

Our first foster baby came with about 18 hours notice; it was respite care, which means we had him for a few days while his regular foster family had a break/dealt with a family emergency. He stayed 3 nights, long enough to come to church and have a dozen people cooing over his little sleeping cheeks.  With each new visitor to our quiet corner, I explained again that he would be going back to his foster family the next day.

Barely a week later, we got a 9am phone call with a fostering request and by the same afternoon, we were snuggling her. This time, we had her for 4 days before church came around. Again, our community was keen to see the little one we had in tow. Again, the question, "How long will she stay?" And this time, "Are you going to adopt her?"


Here in Toronto, when a child is placed in foster care, it is always for an indefinite length of time. It depends on the parents' situation, and whether they are able to make a safe home environment for th…

Fostering FAQ: What's Her (Mom's) Story?

This is probably the second most common question I hear about the baby currently in our care, right after, "Will you keep her?"

It comes in many forms:

"So, what's her story?"
"Is her mom in the picture?"
"How did she end up in your home?
"Is her mom a drug addict?"
"How could a mom not love such a cute baby!"

I get it. It's natural curiousity, and I know I've asked similar questions of my friends who are adoptive parents.

But here's what I'm learning: a child's story is their own. And equally as important, the parent's story is their own.

Imagine how it might feel to hear that for the foreseeable future, you are not allowed to care for your child. On top of whatever difficult circumstances you are already in - perhaps poverty, social isolation, lack of adequate housing, domestic violence, intergenerational trauma, drug or alcohol dependency, low cognitive functioning, or a myriad of other complex strug…